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Dating violence prevention models
Some people who have used violence feel shame about their choices and may cope with it in a number of ways, from addressing it head-on to avoiding it by focusing on their partner’s choices instead of their own.
Support from friends and family, or from a therapist, elder, or support group, may help channel shame to long-term change.
They may do so with the guidance of elders, counsellors, healing circles, support groups, restorative or transformative justice programs, or perhaps with just the support of friends and family.
Sometimes responding to people who are being abused by their partners can be overwhelming.
Sometimes what they need exceeds what others are able to give. When deciding how to help, you might consider: Both the person who experienced violence and the person who used it may benefit from a variety of forms of short-term and long-term support, and from a network rather than a single person.
To avoid reinforcing these effects, resist making decisions on their behalf.
Rather than telling them what you think they should do, begin by asking them what they need to feel safe and supported.